notes of nonsense #104: if i fell in love with you

If I Fell - The Beatles

If I fell in love with you 
Would you promise to be true 
And help me understand 
'Cause I've been in love before 
And I found that love was more 
Than just holding hands 

If I give my heart to you 
I must be sure 
From the very start 
That you would love me more than her 

If I trust in you oh please 
Don't run and hide 
If I love you too oh please 
Don't hurt my pride like her 

'Cause I couldn't stand the pain 
And I would be sad if our new love was in vain 

So I hope you see that I 
Would love to love you 
And that she will cry 
When she learns we are two 
If I fell in love with you

PS: oh well, my all time favorite.  always had been so beautiful, so meaningful. most importantly, it describes me well. :)

notes of nonsense #103: i don't have any heart left

seriously, i need a counselor. i need space and time for myself. do let me to be alone. i've been hurt, wounded, torn apart. sometimes, it made me the tough chick. sometimes it made me be me. but sometimes, at certain times, all the memories that i've tried to drown inside my, just popped and resurfaced. and there's when i'm torn, fragile. like a bullet made of glass. wounded others, and at the same time, be broken itself.

torn to pieces. shattered. crumpled. don't ask why i can't start loving and caring for people. i've lost my heart long ago. fear of being hurt had made me crippled. i wasn't the same Fara as you knew me before. and you can't treat me as the same Fara today. i've changed. from the long period of me waiting you, some heartbrokes in the middle, some mistakes in between the times, some pains, stitches, cuts.

i've lost my heart. and i'm losing my mind too. Allah, help me. i'm no one without you.  :'(