Smile though your heart is aching
Smile even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll see the sun come shining through for you
Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile
Smile - Charlie Chaplin
but terasa nak letak lagu Liyana Fizi - Light Writing dlm post ni. suits my moods more kott. ekceli, rasa sebak. sebab tengok orang da kahwin. yes, imma silent stalker. guwa kenal dia, tapi guwa tak pernah bercakap dengan dia, tak pernah tegur sapa, but i care. as a friend.
ekceli guwa takut. takut apa yang ada di depan mata guwa, were not meant for me in my future. i'm afraid i will commit to wrong person, submit my time to wrong person, exposing my heart to wrong person. guwa takut. guwa takut apa yang guwa pilih akan menjadi sia sia. sebab guwa tengok depan mata guwa sendiri, couple 8 tahun. planning nak kahwin dengan orang yang dia pilih since 8 tahun lepas but in the end, turned to be, 8 years of their relationship was meaningless. and she married someone else recently.
and ada sorang distant friend guwa (*distant ke? entah. tinggal sama sama but we seldom talk. ohh lupa. guwa kan silent stalker. :P). oke berbalik kepada issue distant friend guwa, she married when we were in sem 3. guwa ingat lagi, masa tu guwa baru balik final exam sem 3 and she's baru nak pergi exam, she's wearing cream colored kebaya which i guessed was her baju nikah, which inai still merah dekat jari and she shone beautifully. like butterfly's wings flicked by sunshine in spring morning after rain. guwa envy, guwa rasa sangat, errr jealous. i'm envy of her happiness. yelah, dia cerita dia kenal suami dia 3 months, and then terus kahwin. sweet aite? but then, recently masa guwa mula mula start sem 5 aritu, faculty mate guwa datang bagitaw, she was ex-classmate of my distant friend that went for that sweet early marriage, yang sebenarnya, that distan tfriend, da cerai. guwa terkejut beruk. beruk ponn tak terkejut macam guwa. err. sumpah speechless. i was like, blur sekejap. idk betul ke tak cerita tuu. and if betul ponn, malas laa komen. bukan guwa terlibat ponn kann. kang jadi berdosa lak.
from that incident then i was like.. why why why? sedangkan dia yang bercinta, berkahwin, da rasa alam rumahtangga ponn boleh bercerai, apa lagi me yang just a puny relationship. orang berkahwin, dilanda bah, terus berpisah. guwa wonder how it will be going with me? mampu ke guwa bertahan? sedangkan bukan ada ties ponn yang bound guwa untuk commit to that one single person that i put so close to my heart?
yes, perancangan Allah adalah yang terbaik. kalau ada jodoh tak kemana, kalau takde jodoh mungkin akan ada yang lebih baik. i know. apa yang guwa risaukan is, how strong i will bounce back to face the reality. i'll fall, hard. and i think it will take time for me to recover back. i'm so scared. what should i do? ottoke..
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Sunday, October 27, 2013
notes of nonsense #121: tired and retired
penat. physically and mentally. heartaches. heartbroken. frustrated. dissappointed. bila terlalu kisah, orang tak suka. bila buat tak kisah, ponn orang tak suka. bila buat buat biasa ponn orang tak suka. macam mana lagi guwa nak hidup? tolong bagitaw guwa.
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
notes of nonsense #120: virus bedak sejuk
assalam. tengok title pun da taw an guwa nak membebel apa. opchoii laa pasei bedak sejuk thanakha yang da viral sekarang lepas hot mommy Nora Danish promote an? so guwa ponn tak ketinggalan laa nak rasa tergoda and menjebakkan diri dengan bedak ni.
takde gambar nak tunjuk since guwa pakai fon murah je. siap ada lampu suluh kott kat atas fon tuu. tinggal tak boleh nak transform jadi transformer je. guwa pakai tanaka warna putih, bau jasmine. 1st impression, hmm since it's yang 40g, so me was like, oke, bekas je besaw tapi ekceli, bedak kat dalam tu sikit je. dalam berapa cm je deepness bedak tuu dari lid bekas.
secondly, 1st use. on the day guwa 1st pakai tuu, tengahari. around 2 hours before guwa berangkat pulang ke kampung halaman. so dapat je bedak tuu, guwa terus pakai laa. cara pakai, elok pakai kat singki laa sebab senang ada air mengalir and kalau comot or staining, boleh terus basuh. 1st, lembabkan muka dengan air. guwa pakai lepas mandi and cuci muka semua. basahkan tangan, and colet bedak sapu kat muka. repeat sampai lebam. guwa biasa bawak pakai tidur. oh ye, lupa nak cakap. bau jasmine tuu macam india sikit. guwa tak suggest ah beli bau ni. sakit hidung, menusuk kalbu. eh berbalik kepada apam balik, nak cuci pulak, guwa biasa buat double rinsing sebab bedak ni agak melekat pada kulit and maybe sebab guwa pakai milky cleanser, so kena double rinse kalau nak bagi betul betul bersih dari sisa bedak ni.
err, as result may vary according to individuals, ekceli, guwa tak sesuai kott pakai bedak ni. before bedak ni, guwa memang pakai mask rumpai laut. pakai waktu tidur and kulit guwa, boleh dikatakan agak licin and smooth. but, bila da pakai bedak ni, errrrrr kulit guwa jadi kasar gila and da tak licin. jerawat pun start tumbuh and paling teruk, pores guwa terbuka dengan besar dan banyaknya. before ni guwa memang takde problem pores terbuka ni. and whiteheads tumbuh melata. i've turned to gorgon oredi. siyes, kulit guwa tak sesuai dengan bedak ni. maybe kulit guwa jenis combination dry-oily and sensitif. bedak ni ponn agak drying ekceli. kalau kulit normal or oily sesuai maybe. guwa tengok jugak review before beli, semua orang with different skin types, semua kata bedak ni oke. 1st pakai da lembut tapi maybe guwa yang alah pada bahan bedak ni, so my skin reacts differently. 1st pakai, pores da terbukak and kulit jadi kasar and super kering.
so da jadi gorgon camtu, guwa ponn sedih laa. semalam time keluar beli makanan berbuka, orang bazar tuu siap tanya kenapa muka guwa camni. dari jauh nampak oke cuba bila da datang dekat, tengok in high definition, bapak teruk kott. menggerutu. TT_____TT
so, guwa ponn pergi laa guardian beli cleanser baru yang ada hyloronic acid and toner untuk kecikkan balik pores kat muka guwa ni and start balik pakai mask rumpai laut. wuwuu.. sedih.
readers semua kalau yang memang terlintas nak beli tuu, jangan laa pulak rasa turned off bila guwa cakap camni. results vary according to individuals kann. maybe guwa pakai tak elok, maybe korang pakai pulak elok and gebu je muka. guwa tengok ponn, rata rata yang pakai cakap bedak ni elok, ada tuu kulit memang licin lepas pakai. guwa je special case. and to be safe, better beli yang kecik dulu. kalau tak sesuai pakai, tak rasa menyesal parok sangat. boleh je let go kat sesapa dalam 3, 4 hengget.
huu.. lepas ni memang taknak da laa guwa try macam macam. stick jelaa kat rumpai laut ni. kalau kulit da sensitif tuu, stay jelaa diam diam kat rumah sambil menempek rumpai laut ye cik faraa. sobs sobs. :'(
P/S: baru nak try bedak Kryolan. tapi since muka da teruk macam raksasa gorgon, terpaksalah tunggu kulit muka sembuh dulu and licin balik. :'(
takde gambar nak tunjuk since guwa pakai fon murah je. siap ada lampu suluh kott kat atas fon tuu. tinggal tak boleh nak transform jadi transformer je. guwa pakai tanaka warna putih, bau jasmine. 1st impression, hmm since it's yang 40g, so me was like, oke, bekas je besaw tapi ekceli, bedak kat dalam tu sikit je. dalam berapa cm je deepness bedak tuu dari lid bekas.
secondly, 1st use. on the day guwa 1st pakai tuu, tengahari. around 2 hours before guwa berangkat pulang ke kampung halaman. so dapat je bedak tuu, guwa terus pakai laa. cara pakai, elok pakai kat singki laa sebab senang ada air mengalir and kalau comot or staining, boleh terus basuh. 1st, lembabkan muka dengan air. guwa pakai lepas mandi and cuci muka semua. basahkan tangan, and colet bedak sapu kat muka. repeat sampai lebam. guwa biasa bawak pakai tidur. oh ye, lupa nak cakap. bau jasmine tuu macam india sikit. guwa tak suggest ah beli bau ni. sakit hidung, menusuk kalbu. eh berbalik kepada apam balik, nak cuci pulak, guwa biasa buat double rinsing sebab bedak ni agak melekat pada kulit and maybe sebab guwa pakai milky cleanser, so kena double rinse kalau nak bagi betul betul bersih dari sisa bedak ni.
err, as result may vary according to individuals, ekceli, guwa tak sesuai kott pakai bedak ni. before bedak ni, guwa memang pakai mask rumpai laut. pakai waktu tidur and kulit guwa, boleh dikatakan agak licin and smooth. but, bila da pakai bedak ni, errrrrr kulit guwa jadi kasar gila and da tak licin. jerawat pun start tumbuh and paling teruk, pores guwa terbuka dengan besar dan banyaknya. before ni guwa memang takde problem pores terbuka ni. and whiteheads tumbuh melata. i've turned to gorgon oredi. siyes, kulit guwa tak sesuai dengan bedak ni. maybe kulit guwa jenis combination dry-oily and sensitif. bedak ni ponn agak drying ekceli. kalau kulit normal or oily sesuai maybe. guwa tengok jugak review before beli, semua orang with different skin types, semua kata bedak ni oke. 1st pakai da lembut tapi maybe guwa yang alah pada bahan bedak ni, so my skin reacts differently. 1st pakai, pores da terbukak and kulit jadi kasar and super kering.
so da jadi gorgon camtu, guwa ponn sedih laa. semalam time keluar beli makanan berbuka, orang bazar tuu siap tanya kenapa muka guwa camni. dari jauh nampak oke cuba bila da datang dekat, tengok in high definition, bapak teruk kott. menggerutu. TT_____TT
so, guwa ponn pergi laa guardian beli cleanser baru yang ada hyloronic acid and toner untuk kecikkan balik pores kat muka guwa ni and start balik pakai mask rumpai laut. wuwuu.. sedih.
readers semua kalau yang memang terlintas nak beli tuu, jangan laa pulak rasa turned off bila guwa cakap camni. results vary according to individuals kann. maybe guwa pakai tak elok, maybe korang pakai pulak elok and gebu je muka. guwa tengok ponn, rata rata yang pakai cakap bedak ni elok, ada tuu kulit memang licin lepas pakai. guwa je special case. and to be safe, better beli yang kecik dulu. kalau tak sesuai pakai, tak rasa menyesal parok sangat. boleh je let go kat sesapa dalam 3, 4 hengget.
huu.. lepas ni memang taknak da laa guwa try macam macam. stick jelaa kat rumpai laut ni. kalau kulit da sensitif tuu, stay jelaa diam diam kat rumah sambil menempek rumpai laut ye cik faraa. sobs sobs. :'(
P/S: baru nak try bedak Kryolan. tapi since muka da teruk macam raksasa gorgon, terpaksalah tunggu kulit muka sembuh dulu and licin balik. :'(
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
